Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch (Sprint)

Kuurne-Brussels-Kuurne

Yuuuuup, bike racing is the best.

Also the best: THESE FACES. Niki is always amazing and expressive. I think it's his giant eyes and sense of mischief.

I love Niki. And Niki and Tom together.

Anyway ok, keep it together.

There was all sorts of drama and fireworks on the Oude Kwaremont, with attacks and decisive selections etc... but the minute the coverage started working it all came back together.

Annnnd now we're just riding around Belgium in a big bunch.

Hittin' the finish line for the first time, it's two go-rounds now I think?

Europcar leading the group, giving the commentators a chance to talk about Bryan Coquard and the excellently (and deliciously) named Geoffrey Soupe.

After the commercial break, it's Katusha in charge. With OPQS right behind. Which makes me stressed.

Oh come on is even worth mentioning Tyler Farrar as any kind of contender anymore?

Me too.

Jens Debusschere and jokesmaster general Hendy in the mix for Lotto? I hate when it's literally ANYONE'S race, I struggle to pick a favourite.

Ca pas vraiment payer hier pour Tommeke, comme on l'appelle.... Mais bon il a tellement gagner on peut pas vraiment dire du mal.

Oh god.

Oh god they're talking tactics at the car.

OH MY GOD THE MAN IS JUST TRYING TO HAVE A PISS! They did a slow-mo recap of Matteo Trentin weeing off the side of the bike and then noticing the camera. Can't a man have a bit of dignity!

Katusha still all over the front. MTN behind them and OPQS behind them.

10k to go.

Kiiiind of lined out? Still a big group up front but a lot of people hanging on for dear life at the back.

Sky trying to take some control.

PhilGil in Sky's wheel.

PHILGIL AWAY!

The audio commentary quite evidently now does NOT match the video feed. When everyone was rolling along in the bunch it wasn't noticeable but they forecast that attack from Phil by like 25 seconds before you actually saw it.

I would love if Phil won. But he's only got like 10 seconds. And he did that crazy solo chase only yesterday.

Under the flamme rouge for Phil with only 5 seconds!

APPARENTLY. This delayed video is HORRIFIC and confusing and stress-making.

AHHHHH I CAN HEAR BUT NOT SEE!

I THINK CAV WON!

We'll have to wait about 30 seconds to figure out what the hell went on.

EVERYONE IS ALL OVER THE ROAD

Oh my god it's mayhem.

OH HE WAS WELL AHEAD. That was fantastic thank god.

Whew Cokey Tom nearly got knocked out there! He goes to make a move and someone practically body checks him!

Viviani third!

Oh il est LOIN d'être mort hein, le sprinteur britannique!

Oh yeah, the donkey. Nice one.