Saturday, 4 March 2017

Into the Gladiator's Arena

Strade Bianche:

I mean damn that WAS a little funny.

This Namedsport nonsense always makes it seem like someone didn't fill out a template correctly.

Shit's about to get real.

TURN OFF THE DOWNHILL SKIING THE RACE IS KICKING OFF

Ok dubbed commercials for over the top American tv shows are moderately more entertaining but still. BIKES PLEASE.

Mehhhhhhhhh, sad face. TURN OFF THE BIATHLON.

Siena does look absolutely gorge.

COME ON STOP TALKING JUST PUT THE RACE ON

Peter's all black World's gear is stylish. Can that make a comeback?

Last year was great don't get me wrong but I'd like to watch this year please

Plus it reminds us FAB ISN'T HERE WHICH I CAN'T ACCEPT

Tommy Dumoulin is so cute.

Oh Styby! He's so adorbs.

I really wish that. I hope to get here again some really nice results.

Peter's pre-race interview here suggests he's not feeling well, though he was in that front group earlier..

Oh.

OH. OH SHIT. They're showing the front group and it's BETTER THAN THEY WERE LETTING ON: KWIATO, STYBY, TOMMY OF THE MILL, BELGIAN TED, also Tiesj and Sean de Bie.

This of course the front CHASER group, not the boring escapees currently leading the race.

MONTE SANTE MARIE

or should I say SECTEUR SPARTACUS

MORENO MOSER HAS JOINED THEM

Explose encore a nouveaux

PUSH IT TIM

TEAR THEM LIMB FROM LIMB or something

I do love the French language. Also it's nice to be able to understand the commentary for the first time this season.

Oh Thibaut. You gotta sort out this crippling fear of descents.

Ohhhhh it looks sooooo windy!

Eurosport, are you a legitimate sporting news organisation? What is this coverage? It's like a peeping tom camera through some trees 500 miles away. This is useless.

Tim split that group up with his accelerations and is away with Styby, Kwiato, Tommy, and Tiesj. GVA and Durbo also.

And the escapees are disappearing randomly up there as well.

Now it's just Tim, Styby, GVA and Tom...

Maybe?

At least they're honest.

I think I've been watching too much ANTM. It feels like everyone is working their angles here.

Anyway, 43k to go. The excellent chasing group has a few passengers and is within 30 seconds of Thibaut and his duo.

Tom is like GO ON you Lottos!

Some other people have joined the chase group.

Not inaccurate, but also this is very nearly a dad joke.

Kwiato, Tom, Styby are in front with the remnants of the escapees

I know there's weather but can we get this feed breakup sorted?

I mean the still images are beautiful but.. NOT WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR.

Still three more secteurs assez interessant

Styby is PUSHING

Michal is fighting now.

Everyone is basically just trying to stay in contact, dotted around the countryside.

They're all kind of THERE, it would be helpful if we didn't keep referring to them as a GROUP when they're one inch off the front.

Kwiato was gesturing at the camera moto to back off.

That front group is getting weird and Kwaito's like 'uhhhhhh well I'm going...'

Bauke watching the race through my eyes.

TIM WEELENS QUI RELANCE AVEC STYBAR DANS LA ROUE

Also was it Tim or was it that Katusha dude?

Onto some GROAD now

Kwiato goes again!

TIM IS GOING FOR IT BIGTIME UP THIS HILL

Je ferme la parenthese parce que la course joue

He was on a not-uninteresting rant about how EBH never lived up to his hype and how G is a much better rider.

If this is true (and you never know even WHEN YOU'RE WATCHING IT) this is a great group.

Though obviously GVA is the weak link.

20k.

Styby has lucky number 13 today.

Tommy of the Mill looks like he has joined this front group!

Also Durbridge.

Arm warmers comin' off for Styby

Vest off for Kwiato

CA RECHAUFFE

When did Juul Jensen get here?

Social media is seeming unusually out of sorts today.

It's not like Italy could ever be ugly but it's a little bit less pretty under this gloom.

YAAAAAAS KWEEEEEEEN

I love this man everybody knows it

13k

COMME SUR LES PAVES DE PARIS ROUBAIX

He has 11 seconds with just over 11k to go!!

He looks behind but he's gaining time!

I mean except for Greg I like the chasers as well (Tim and Styby) but STILL

KWIATO IS IN SIENA

He's riding on the pavement. Somebody'll have something to say about that.

Up into an uphill now

Those socks are pretty sweet.

Sing it girl. It's hard being a bike nerd.

LET'S NOT JINX IT EVERYBODY BUT COME ON KWIATOOOOOOOOOO

5k to goooooo

4

It doesn't SEEM like 27 seconds but GO ON KWAITO

He's checking behind him while in a supertuck cuz he's a BOSS

That is a very dangerous turn.

GOOD LORD he got close to that wall! SAFETY FIRST KWIATO 1.5 to GO

FLAMME ROUGE IN POLISH IS CZERWONY PŁOMIEN

He's up in the uphill up into the Piazza!

Cameras are flashing!

IT IS BEAUTIFUL

CLIMB KWIATO CLIMB

He's out of the saddle looking back

They are trying behind but they won't get him!

GOD HOW LONG IS THIS

THIS IS TRECHEROUS ROAD

HE IS UP

YAAAAAAAS

YAAAAAAS HE SAYS GET WITH ME PEOPLE

Classic Greg.

Tim got third!

Kwiato is rather woozy

Tom might get 5th here

God they're rather weathered. Rough going out there today.

This is great it slow mo.  HE IS SO GREAT

OH MY FUCKING GOD HE LIKE TOOK OUT HIS SOIGNEUR LIKE A BADASS BEAR CUB.

Honestly, something about that final bit up into Piazza del Campo is SO GLADIATORIAL.

Maybe that's why Fab won so many times.

Yeah weird once again the Garmindales seemed to not even field a team here.

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED

BOOM BABY

I wish we could see some adorable post-race chat from him.

You guys are fucking killing me: straight into the action here with the Gibraltar World Champion Snooker.

Way to kill the vibe.

Talk about killing the vibe on an otherwise GREAT podium. DAMMIT GREG.

Hoookaaaay, I could cry. This is like a masterclass in being adorable. I think he must just be a really lovely human being.

ARE THEY TRYING TO MAKE ME CRY

I gotta go to this race one day.

OMFG Tom seem like he honestly would GENUINELY say boy oh boy!

Ah the lesser known #dirtyfacesDONTwin races.

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