Omloop Het Nieuwsblad:
This team is GIVIN' ME LIFE, as the kids say.
This man is a legend.
Speaking of which... Luke in 't Kuipke? THIS FEELS SO RIGHT.
URGHHHH struggling up a cobbled climb!!
THE MUUUUURRRRRR!!! It's so gorgeous!
Guess De Karper was full.
I'm overexcited and there's too much racing going on. Got images of wintertime Belgium next to twitter going 'I don't think this is Jebel Hafeet...'
There is someone called VAN GOETHEM??!
Omfg this Belgian dude should be president. It just doesn't get old.
I still can't totally believe Greg won this last year.
Stijn is on AG2R now?!?
Sep somehow seems like he was always at Garmindale, on the other hand.
THESE COMMENTATORS DON'T KNOW WHAT SVGGENT IS AND I DO GIVE ME A JOB
AWWWW I WISH I COULD UNDERSTAND THIS
Peter I am no fan of this scraggly beard thing going on but seriously, HAIR GOALS.
Kristoff please don't Kristoff this.
AW HEY ILJO
What are we looking at here? An inflatable didn't go wrong again did it?
...Oh apparently there was a crash? Unclear.
I feel like this mental screamer and I would get along.
I spy echelons!!
Knowing Pippo Pozzato is a previous winner, Leigh Howard fancies his chances today.
OOOOF that poor soul!
Oh no it's Zakkari Dempster!! He looked like maybe he was blown over up onto the curb and went down so hard!
Some soothing images of Iljo leading the peloton now.
I can't lie I'm not suuuuuper in love with the new kit. I was SUCH a fan of last year's shade of blue.
OH NO
Two dudes got blown into a ditch or something. The Giant (I cannot get on board with 'Sunweb') is NOT happy.
Massive Cannondale piss time
HEY LE CROW
What up Ronse! See you soon for the RVV shuttle bus!
Looks like a lot of flats going on.
Kruisberg!
OPQS looks like Topsport Vlaanderen now. Which can be ok but you know, bring back the OPQS blue.
I hope this man is a Luke Rowe fan who struggles with spelling.
Several Frenchies stopped here. Hope one will have an epic meltdown.
Basically a modern retelling of Captain Planet going on here.
NO NO NO NO NO
Everyone is down.
Tom is down?
All of Bahrain for sure
OH NO TOM
OH NO TOM
He's still standing there, with a tear in his shorts.
Ahh Kristoff is in a bad way.
How did that even happen??
They're saying all these names and I don't know in what context!!!
OH MAN that FDJ sure thinks this guy is to blame! That seems unnecessary, probably doesn't need to be physically assaulted after a crash.
Stuyven is not messing around on the Taaienberg!
Peter when did you get here?
LOVE.
Twitter says Tom crashed AGAIN but is up. COME BACK AND WIN IT ALL TOM
Who's up here please?
Peter, what I assume is Sep, Stannard, Moscon, and a third Sky they suggest...
Greg, I suppose I should mention.
STYBY
They say he is in the front group!
Peter taking it up at the front!
I mean there's still 50k to go but still.
WOLVENBERG
Yes. It's hard to want anyone else to be World Champion.
Grivko, Goujons, and someone called BOUDAT are also part of the front group, for info.
I mean there are like 5 'groups' up there chasing each other but, you know, UP THERE.
WHAT WHAT LUKE!?
Maybe I misheard because I love him so much.
Peter's like do some work dudes!
PhilGil is chasing somewhere at the front
Save it for Roubaix guy.
So, 1) escapees from earlier no one cares about, 2) Peter's rainbow jersey group, and 3) Luke's dudes ft. PhilGil and Styby. Situation recap.
Alright now I'm just lost.
Group 3 is large and unwieldy
ROWE AND CO
That might have been another translation mishear but also should be the name of like a trendy clothing company
Are they now calling Group 3 the peloton?
Ah everyone's within a minute of each other basically now anyway.
Peter's rainbow club is for sure about to catch these escapees
Boom.
Imagine that comin' atcha.
WHAT'S UP PETER?! He's having a mechanical or something.
40k and 40 seconds between front and peloton.
Luke is I think chatting to a Direct Energie.
Peter does so much work. Surely that's not smart?
Oh finally, I thought, a contribution from Greg! But it was just a dodgy camera angle.
Sep trying to take the lead up the Molenberg
STYBY ATTACKING FROM THE BACK
A little baby group has got away here
Or I dunno there's a lot of splitting up
Sigh. He should be driven around the route anyway so his people may see him.
Peter's bunnyhopping over danger
And then there were three...
Peter Greg and Sep have 33 seconds on everyone else with 28k to go
A lot of OPQS at the front of this chase but we know that's never a good thing.
Greg's bike is shedding shit and it nearly took out Sep. NOT COOL GREG.
GREG
WHAT THE FUCK GET IT TOGETHER. He just went to grab something from the soigneur and nearly clotheslined Sep!
WOOOOAH
Luke just shouted HEY and gave someone the finger.
Think the motorbike was too close for his liking.
P.M.J. Gilbert!? What is he, a wealthy Victorian orphan?
I mean also what are his middle names, just out of curiosity?
This group is still holding at 30 seconds. About the enter the last cobbles of the day.
PMJ Esq. and Styby are at the head of the chase behind
A tailwind eh?!!
15k
Guys this break isn't gonna be caught by a Direct Energie and a Wanty.
Quite an ugly shot of Gent they chose to use there.
GENT IS A STUNNER STOP YOUR PROPAGANDA
Hier met Luke Rowe.
I understand that.
So cute Leo!
Bora got some good teammies in this year with Leo the Lion King and Burgy.
10k and if anything that gap is going UP
I mean Peter needs to win this, if it's gonna be these three.
LUKE AND SYBY IN YER FACE COME ON DIG IN GUYS
Loving that this is a thing. Surely quite cold though if he's been out there for the whole race?
God it's up to 45 seconds now.
Bleurg. It's not that I don't LIKE Greg and Sep it's just
Meh.
Alright Peter. LET'S DO THIS
5k
4
Rowe and Co (Co here being THE ENTIRETY OF OPQS) rolling in whenever here. Save it for Roubaix dudes.
1.5k
KICKIN OFF AT THE FLAMME
Sort of. It looked like it might but didn't.
Peter leading the way OF COURSE
Peter looks back
300 meters
Sep goes from the back
ALL OVER THE ROAD
GREG
NO
DON'T YOU DARE GREG
NO
UGH Peter tried.
Well whatever have this one.
A bizarre solo sprint for fourth from Felline there.
Man Sep really faded there at the end.
Watch me.
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